you

Heartbreak. The worst kind of death.

Didn’t die, but hurts like breathing no longer helps.

Heartbreak. The most alive feeling.

Still breathing, but rather not.

Heartbreak. The great reminder.

If not for heartbreak, I might forget. and I don’t wanna forget.

Tears, emptiness, numbness, can’t feel a single thing. Supposedly not what I wanted for you, but we both know it’s inevitable.

I want you to be free, I want you to be happy again, I want you to feel again, I want you to live. Even these lines came out of your mouth. I never wanted this, we never ever wanted it, but it’s the right thing to do, right?

and hours after you left, I prayed,

Dear Lord, 

Heal him, soothe his heart, cover him under Your wings, be there for him whenever he needed You. 

You’re his father, help him get over this.

Give him wisdom, give him humility, give him joy, give him forgiveness. Show him the love you showed me. Heal him the way you heal me. 

Give us both strength to resist the temptation for escaping this.

Help us get through it.

Amen. 

I know everything’s gonna be okay. Remember how much I love you, I don’t care what it takes, I just want you to be safe and sound. Joyful and heartbreak-free. Whatever you need,  you know I’m always here.

Don’t let this saddens you, we knew it wasn’t over. With everything I have, I wish you well.

 

 

It feels way much better writing happy endings.

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